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PRODUCT REVIEW
Dear Diary: Ugly cow, killing ducks
By David Gewirtz
About this article
It's the heat of summer, a time when people's hearts and minds turn to...mush. For some strange reason, they think about such things as barbecues, baseball, flowers, motorcycles, and picnics when they should be thinking about ways to avoid that bright yellow thing in the sky. In the interests of protecting our readers from the evils of that place called "outside," we bring you the first in a series of articles exploring the World of Warcraft.
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Dear Diary,
Today I moved into the World of Warcraft. It was fun, but the move was a lot of work. First, I had to load all the CDs. For some reason, the install process was slower than my Big Aunt Mabel running in the sock races last July 4. I mean, it took hours!
Fortunately, after a while, everything was loaded and it was time to play. I was so excited, my palms were all sweaty. After quickly wiping them on my jeans, I grabbed my mouse and clicked that pretty little icon on my desktop. I was rewarded with a long and exciting End User License Agreement. I felt honored that the World of Warcraft wanted to have an agreement with me, and after reading a paragraph and then scrolling to the end, I was in!
Well, nearly. I like this world. They're very careful who they let in. Not only do you have to qualify by buying the game, you have to give them all sorts of information and even your credit card (I guess like a damage deposit), just to be allowed into the hallowed gates. Of course, I gave them all they asked, and then I was in!
Well, not quite. Again, I'm very impressed with this world. They're very thorough. For once you install the game and come to an agreement, and give them all your worldly information, they check to make sure you're completely up to date. The update loading process took about an hour, somewhat less than it took me to get through customs when I had to declare all those "art" pictures I brought back into the country. What was nice about it, this time, was there were no disapproving stares!
And then I was in!
Well, almost. First, I had to join a realm. The World nicely suggested a few to me, but I knew I needed to join IceCrown. That was nice. Then I had to tell the World my name. Unfortunately, someone else took my trademarked "Blackbeard" name, but I quickly made up another. In this world, I am Darklore.
In fact, in this world, I am Darklore, the incredibly ugly cow. That's right. I chose the big bull option as my character, because I am a Taurus and I can certainly identify with big bull. It felt right and it felt good.
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